How to make Lasting Changes in the New Year instead of Meaningless Resolutions

With a new year at hand, many are looking to make changes. Some will make resolutions about how they will stop eating junk, quit avoiding the gym, or eliminate something toxic from their life. But, there are inherent problems with making resolutions. Here’s a better method.

Definition of resolution:

1. a firm decision to do or not to do something... "she kept her resolution not to see Anne anymore, a New Year's resolution."

Making a resolution to stop a bad habit is a flawed approach to change

Goal setting is a far superior method to making lasting changes. I suggest doing away with new year's resolutions altogether, and here is why. Resolutions are usually attached to a negative aspect of one's life, so they are reductive in nature. 

Let me explain... If I have a resolution to stop something, I have attached a negative action to myself to begin with. This is a flawed way to go about changing because it assumes a flawed individual. 

Example 

I eat too much junk (negative description of myself) and I need to quit, another negative / reductive – description / action. 

STEP 1

Instead, think in Proactive Terms by Setting Goals

1. Start off by setting proactive goals that are positive in nature instead of negative resolutions which are typically attached to a flaw. 

2. Use – I will language, “I will” meet my (prescribed positive) goal.

3. Set goals that are measurable because that which is measurable is manageable.

4. Be specific and realistic with the number of goals you set.

   1. Consider a few personal, professional, physical, and spiritual. 

(Goal-setting example)

I will put healthy things into my body for the next fourteen days. Then define what healthy is. (This is a specific manageable goal.)

This methodology of goal setting is focused on developing strengths instead of fixing a weakness. Psychologically, one says, “I have inherent strength, and I am going to use it to my advantage,” instead of, “I have this weakness that I must fix.”

STEP 2

Come up with the “Why” behind your Goals

Attach a proactive higher purpose to your change. Why are you changing? A great way to define your “Why” is to ask yourself the “Why Question” three times and make sure your answers are proactively leading to your higher purpose. 

(Example - using the above goal-setting format)

Why am I only putting healthy things into my body for the next fourteen days?

Answer #1

“Because I want to live a long and full life.”

Why do I want to live a long and full life?

Answer #2

“Because I want to be able to achieve my purpose on Earth.”

Why do I want to be able to achieve my purpose on Earth?

Answer #3

“Because I was put on this Earth to do [insert purpose here].”

Once you have figured out the WHY behind your goals, write it with each goal, so you can attach purpose to them.

Three things to do once you have finished writing out your goals that will make all the difference.